5 THINGS I STRUGGLE WITH AS A MOM

There is no book, advice or class out there to prepare you for the adventures you are about to endure as a parent. No one is ever ready to take on the role of a parent. Something will always come up, and things will happen that need to be done before you are, in fact, "ready." When you are not ready, you will most likely cry and feel hopeless. It’ll feel like you didn’t live life to its fullest and you aren’t ready.

Millennials popular culture today includes things that after you have gotten all the desires of weekend partying, monthly getaways, great sex, awesome work promotions and binge-shopping, sometimes life throws us a curve ball. And, the last thing you know, you're knocked up, alone and lost.

I have learned that talking about my struggles & embracing the fact that I’m not perfect, has helped me in so many ways. So, here  I am sharing to you the struggles I experienced as a mom.

*PATIENCE*

I truly believe that patience is one of the hardest lessons of being a parent. You will be surprised of how much patience you will accrue when you have children of your own.You wouldn’t believe the amount of times I have to stop what I’m doing & take a deep breath to keep myself from losing my cool. I love Zavi more than anything, but that doesn’t mean that she doesn't test my patience. In fact, raising a little human requires the most insane amount of patience! Teaching them & guiding their lives so that they will become functioning adults is not an easy task.

In order to keep your sanity through the career of parenting, it is an utmost requirement to have it, or at least to be able to fake it, But in my opinion, being a parent is the most rewarding experience & worth every little moment of frustration.

*GUILT*

 If you’re a mom, you know exactly what I’m talking about! You might come across scum bags who judge you for your parenting habits or for becoming a parent so young (they usually are the ones who have no children), you will come across the kind of people who understand your struggle and applaud your efforts. I respect the advice they had given especially coming from older women, moms and parents who raised their kids. I admit I have a lot of things to learn in parenthood but everyday is a learning experience. There are times I cannot contain my emotions and I get angry at  Zavi, I sometimes lay a hand at her and it will really make me feel guilty after I see her crying. I will console her and explain to her why Mommy hit her. As much as  I try to hold my self and be patient sometimes you'll just gonna break down. And I am a prime believer of the old ways our parents disciplined us although not to the extent that you'll hurt her everywhere. Only in the butt and hands!! I also believe that we are all doing the best we can & as women, we should be encouraging each other & not tearing each other down.  We as a parent have our own unique ways on raising our  kids and we should all respect that. We feel enough mom guilt on our own so let’s stop making each other feel down about our choices & start embracing our differences.

 *COMPARISON*

People aren’t lying when they say that comparison is the thief of joy. I can go from having a great day & feeling like supermom to questioning every parental decision I’ve ever made. That might sound dramatic but if you’re a parent, you know that it’s so easy to compare yourself to other parents. Especially with social media these days. I find myself looking at other moms & thinking, “how do they look so put together all the time!?” It’s easy to compare your life to them, especially  those who have everything in the whole world, fortune, glamour, and a complete family which I can never give to my daughter. But, I’ve finally learned that no one’s life is picture perfect. If anyone tries to claim that, they’re straight up lying to you! Every single human being has bad days & that is perfectly okay! So the next time you find yourself comparing your life or mothering skills to someone else, take a minute to look around & find the things that you’re thankful for. That might sound silly but whenever I think of all the great things in my life, it makes it easier to stop comparing myself & my life to anyone else.

*TIME*

There really aren’t enough hours in the day, so the art of time management is probably one of the most important lessons parenthood can offer. Time is of the essence when you are a parent. In the blink of an eye, your day will be over, and in the next blink, your children will no longer need you to change their diapers or remind them to brush their teeth. I have learned a lot of things in this journey of parenthood and that is to cherish every moments. Zavi is growing up so fast and everyday she learns a lot of things. She thought me to appreciate a lot more of the little things in life. Stopping to smell the flowers, admire everything we come across, evenings spent watching Disney movies or simple joys of playing toys and dress up play actually makes me realize how beautiful life is & how lucky we are to live in this incredible world. The time I spent with my daughter is so valuable, so  I tell you to embrace those moments. Lose yourself in the stories you read to them and play pretends like you used to back in the day.

 *MYSELF*

A mother wants nothing more than to see the warm smiles on her children’s faces, have fun with them and talk about all kinds of things. A mother struggles to ensure that her children can have a good life. Apart from making sure that they are safe, and have enough to eat and wear, a mother will face a thousand and one little challenge while trying to raise her kids right. It is important to acknowledge the effort and sacrifices of our mothers, and just once in a while, cut them some slack and do something nice for them.

 I  struggle to balance my self and everything as a mom. I have learned in the most hard way of raising my kid alone and having the full support of my dad and my family. I admit I neglected taking care of myself from the moment Zavi was born. It was my way of punishing myself of all the wrong things I have done. Zavi came to me unexpectedly and it changed my whole life. But, I never regret having Zavi at such a young age and having to raise her without the support of her father.

I prioritized the needs of my daughter and I told myself not to think of the things I need. I tried to forget all the things I used to do and just focused in work and how to raise Zavi. And who am I fooling? Sometimes we need to learn the hard way, I tried to pick all things up in my life and tried to love myself more. As what they have said, you cannot love someone else when you don't love yourself. So I learned to regain my confidence and do the things I used to do. When you're a mom everything changes, you must weigh things up and hold on to what matters to you. Things are different but it doesn't mean you must give up the things you loved to do.  And, when you learn to overcome the struggles yourself are facing, life is beautiful. we only live once so don't limit yourself from the things you wanted to achieve before just because you have a human to take care of now. Everything you do are all for them, for their future and how you can mold them as a better version of themselves.