We are all a sucker for Something More but we are afraid to Give More
Why can't people understand that not everything can be solved just by getting rid of that mistake. It's like making another mistake out of a mistake.
I know, anyone who will hear my story will say that I should have done this, I should have choose this, this should be done if, lots of what ifs, lots of anger, pity and any kind of things that they will feel about me.
I am not that bad to just opt for something that I know I'll going to regret someday. I am not that kind of person that will think of myself first.. i know they only want what's the best for me but getting rid of a mistake will never be an option.
People will talk, I get that. People will wonder, people will say such things about me, but do I really care?
Of course I care, but there are others who understands me better than them and that is what I'm living for right now
I fucked up my life but it doesn't mean I am going to be like this forever. I am going to stand again, put my guard up again, I'll dream big again. I'll trust people again, and I'll make those who loves me proud again.
I am not perfect and I don't want to be one.. i have my flaws, I have my weakness, my downfall..
I thought this year will be my year but I think it isn't because of all the problems I am encountering now.
People will understand me soon after they had judged me on why I choose to do this, why I continued to live with this, and left my future. I know my decisions aren't that good but I think this is for the best.
I am going to hurt the two most important man in my life but I know with God's guidance ,He will give them strength to accept the fact that everything has changed.
I know I won't be alone in this battle as God will never turn His back on me. I don't know what His reasons for making this. But I got to be strong..
Xoxo,
Nicole
- I need to be strong..
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